Ranking Every Rob Schneider Movie: From Worst to First

Let’s get one thing straight before we begin: I do not like Rob Schneider, and I think he is a genuinely bad person. The absolute only reason why he even has a career in Hollywood is because of Adam Sandler, and the vast majority of his movies only exist because Adam Sandler carried him there. Without Adam, Rob Schneider’s career would have been dead and buried a long time ago, and none of us would have to be subjected to hearing about his uninformed, simple-minded opinions on a daily basis. But since we are stuck in a reality where he made movies, let’s rank them. I co-host a podcast called Rob Schneider Could Ya Not? and you can listen to our full thoughts on all his films there if you’re looking for full, in depth reviews.

15. InAPPropriate Comedy (2013)

This isn’t even a real movie; it’s a torturous collection of deeply unfunny, racist, and joyless sketches directed by Vince Offer, also known as the ShamWow Guy. Rob Schneider is top-billed, yet he barely appears in the film, only showing up in a few horrific segments like a fake porno review where he’s clearly just reading off a teleprompter. The movie tries to be "edgy" but instead just regurgitates tired stereotypes and double entendres without a single actual punchline. It is hands-down the most pathetic, comedy-killing waste of time ever put to film. 0 out of 5 stars

14. Dead Wrong (2024)

This convoluted film is two hours of terrible pacing and bizarre timelines that feel like a Tubi original film that should have been canceled mid production. Rob Schneider plays a sleazy mob lawyer who orchestrates a scheme to steal a newborn baby from a hospital so the father can sue for millions. Schneider flip-flops through scenes, randomly delivering an incredibly out-of-place, dramatic monologue yelling at hospital executives that makes zero sense. The only decent part of the entire bloated mess is Chet Hanks playing a gangster with a moral compass. 0 out of 5 stars

13. The Chosen One (2010)

This film is a bleak, depressing drama disguised as a comedy. Schneider directs and stars as a suicidal car salesman whose wife leaves him and whose father hangs himself. This is a plot point that leads to an insane, melodramatic scene where Rob cries while cradling a hawk. The movie features agonizingly slow pacing, atrocious green-screen effects of New York City, and shameless product placements for Nissan and Fiji Water. The singular saving grace is Paul Giamatti’s brother, Marcus, who steals the show as a fellow car salesman. This is a film so forgotten and impossible to find that John Oliver mocked it in 2026. Sorry John, but we actually watched this trash. 0 out of 5 stars

12. Big Stan (2007)

Directed and produced by Schneider himself, this straight-to-DVD movie tells the story of a white-collar criminal who hires a martial arts guru (David Carradine) to teach him how to fight so he won't be sexually assaulted in prison. Almost every single joke relies on rampant homophobia, prison assault, or tired racial stereotypes. Schneider's directing is completely inept, featuring moving sets and bizarre camera zooms. Furthermore, it asks the audience to root for a completely unlikable, selfish con man who treats his wife terribly. 0 out of 5 stars

11. Daddy Daughter Trip (2022)

Schneider returns to the director's chair for this family film, co-written by his wife (now ex-wife) and starring his daughter, Miranda. It features Rob as a failed inventor who comes up with a "hula hoop with a shower curtain around it" and gets scammed out of his savings by John Cleese in a terrifying wig. The acting is incredibly stiff, and the plot drags on forever with terrible animated storytelling sequences. Shockingly, the only genuinely funny moment in the entire film is an extended, eight-minute sequence of a dog aggressively farting. How can Rob Schneider have zero chemistry with his own family? 0 out of 5 stars

10. Norm of the North (2016)

An animated fever dream where Rob voices Norm, a polar bear who travels to New York City to stop a billionaire from building condos in the Arctic. The plot is a convoluted disaster featuring invincible, constantly-urinating lemmings and a bizarre sequence where Norm goes viral for doing a dance called the "Arctic Shake". The animation quality dips constantly, and the movie can't even get simple geography right, treating the audience like complete idiots. It’s insane to us that they somehow made more of these films, but at least they learned their lesson and didn’t ask Rob back. 0 out of 5 stars

9. Home Team (2022)

This Happy Madison production uses the real-life NFL Bountygate scandal as a flimsy backdrop for a terrible kid's sports movie. Sean Payton is portrayed as an arrogant jerk coaching his son's middle school football team, while Rob Schneider is shoehorned in as a highly annoying, stereotypical vegan. The football scenes make no logical sense, the child characters have zero personality, and the movie completely fails to deliver the heartwarming sports narrative it aims for. 0 out of 5 stars

8. Surf Ninjas (1993)

A chaotic 90s kid's movie featuring "motosurfing" and actual ninjas. Rob Schneider plays a high schooler despite obviously being 30 years old, sporting a bizarre haircut and somehow managing to be the least funny part of the film. The movie mashes together heavily armed mercenaries, poorly choreographed sword fights, and a completely unhinged Leslie Nielsen acting like a cyborg dictator. If you saw this a child you probably have fond memories, but watching it as an adult is painful. 0 out of 5 stars

7. The Benchwarmers (2006)

Three adult men form a baseball team to violently dominate little league kids in a movie devoid of any real stakes. Rob Schneider is severely miscast as the cool, calm athlete with a gorgeous wife. A dynamic that feels completely unnatural and unbelievable. The script is incredibly lazy, leaning heavily on product placement for Pizza Hut and NetZero. Only John Lovitz, playing a nerdy billionaire named Mel Clark (and dealing with the unfortunate name "Smegma"), manages to bring any actual comedy to the screen. 1 out of 5 stars

6. The Hot Chick (2002)

In this agonizing Freaky Friday knockoff, an attractive but cruel teenager swaps bodies with a sleazy criminal played by Schneider. Instead of treating the body-swap with any cleverness, the film relies entirely on Schneider acting out incredibly offensive stereotypes of a teenage girl, coupled with gross-out gags like him trying to pee at a nightclub trough. The film is bloated at an hour and 45 minutes and is riddled with deeply racist jokes. Anna Faris’s excellent comedic timing is the only thing keeping it from being lower. 1 out of 5 stars

5. Judge Dredd (1995)

Not really a Rob Schneider film, but we’re keeping it on the list because it’s one of Rob’s biggest films. A $90 million sci-fi blunder where Sylvester Stallone apparently demanded rewrites to make the dark, satirical comic book adaptation more of a buddy comedy. Enter Rob Schneider, who plays Dredd's obnoxious sidekick. His constant whining and out-of-place humor completely ruin the tone of a movie that already suffers from terrible action sequences and a convoluted plot. If you want to see a better version then check out the underrated 2012 film Dredd. Otherwise, stay away from this. 1 out of 5 stars

4. The Animal (2001)

Schneider plays a pathetic loser who gets animal organs transplanted into him after a car crash, causing him to take on bizarre animal urges. He spends the entire movie aggressively eating, humping mailboxes, and even seducing a goat in one highly disturbing scene. The movie relies on cheap gags and an impossibly perfect love interest who overlooks his psychotic behavior. The absolute best part of the movie is a brilliant, brief cameo by Norm MacDonald leading an angry mob. 1 out of 5 stars

3. Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (1999)

The very first Happy Madison production cemented the horrific formula Schneider would use for his entire career. He plays a creepy aquarium cleaner who is forced to become a gigolo to pay for a broken fish tank. He is sent on dates with various beautiful women who are entirely defined by absurd physical ailments or disabilities (narcolepsy, Tourette's, being tall). It establishes his trademark of playing a completely unlikable creep who somehow still gets the girl out of sheer pity. 1 out of 5 stars

2. Knock Off (1998)

This movie is an absolutely batsh*t insane 90s action flick directed by Tsui Hark, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme and Rob Schneider as fashion designers who are secretly involved with the CIA. It features some of the most chaotic pacing and ridiculous camera shots ever filmed. Including multiple POV shots zooming inside of shoes and cell phones. From Jean-Claude Van Damme entering a rickshaw race while being whipped by an eel, to a man being murdered by a "loose" rocket fired from a safe, the pure absurdity makes it genuinely entertaining. 1 out of 5 stars

1. Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005)

Taking the number one spot is a sequel so spectacularly unhinged that it wraps all the way back around to being a masterpiece of madness. The plot follows Deuce as he travels to Amsterdam, ostensibly to clear his former pimp of a string of Jack the Ripper-style man-whore murders. It's a cinematic disaster that earned five Golden Raspberry nominations, which Schneider actually proudly boasted about in a full-page ad, and even won him the Razzie for Worst Actor. But its unrelenting, chaotic insanity easily makes it the most unforgettable Rob Schneider experience in existence.

What follows in this film is a fever dream of offensive jokes and shock humor that defies all logic. The movie subjects the audience to a barrage of unhinged moments, such as someone eating soggy french fries out of a toilet while a cat violently bites them below the belt. However, the absolute peak of this gross-out absurdity involves a woman with a male member on her face who literally sneezes bodily fluids onto an innocent bystander eating soup. This somehow culminates in a grand finale where she trips and her nose gets lodged perfectly into the tracheotomy hole of another woman.

It is undeniably an awful film, but it is so spectacularly bad that it is actually great. The unrelenting, chaotic madness makes it a genuinely fun bad movie to watch with a group of friends. In fact, there is a reason why this film takes place in Amsterdam, you are legitimately supposed to be high out of your mind when watching it. So grab a pack of beer, gather five of your best friends in the same room, and embrace the madness.

This is a film we enjoyed so much that we ended up watching it again years later just to relive all the amazing moments with our co-host, Marie Maloney, that missed it. 5 out of 5 stars

Final Thoughts

Looking back at this definitive ranking, the main takeaway is glaringly obvious: Rob Schneider’s filmography is an absolute cinematic wasteland. As we've explored through these reviews, his movies rely entirely on a formula of cheap shock value, exhausting fart jokes, and tired, offensive stereotypes. It bears repeating that he possesses zero actual comedic talent or acting range, and his career only survived as long as it did because Adam Sandler was willing to carry him and continuously hand him roles he didn't deserve.

If you enjoyed this list and want more rankings or reviews check out our podcast Adam Sandler Please Stop anywhere you listen to podcasts. We'll be updating these rankings with any new film that Rob Schneider might make, but just taking a look at his IMDb shows us that, thankfully, he's probably done making films.